Way Off Topic: A trip to China and Other Reflections on Meaning in Life

[DarterBlue2]

In case any of you have wondered, I have been absent from this board due to being out of the country for most of the last four weeks. Over two of those weeks were spent in mainland China, where my younger son lives and works. So no, I have not abandoned the board due to the end of football season, though I fully admit I have way less to contribute with respect to basketball. However, I do plan to post my comments and observations on basketball, and other off season sports from a Central Florida perspective over the next several weeks. I will begin my reemergence, though, with a brief description of my trip to foreign shores. 

 

For the past five and a half years, my younger son has lived in the far east, first in Thailand and now in mainland China. He went to Thailand to to satisfy his curiosity of things Asian and pursue graduate studies. From Thailand he moved to China to pursue a woman whom he believes to be the love of his life. I shall let time decide the wisdom of his move, but for now China is his home. As a parent it is with mixed feelings that you view your child ending up on the other side of the earth: On the one hand you want him or her to be happy; on the other, you realize that if they are you will be forever be separated by more than 10,000 miles. And, even in this highly technological age, that distance has its effects on even the strongest relationships. Anyway, this post is about observations gleaned from the trip which I lay out below.

 

The purpose of the trip was to attend my son's wedding ceremony. 

 

The trip from Central Florida to China spans 13 time zones and, depending on the route taken, involves anything from 17 to 23 hours of flight. This is by far the longest trip I have ever taken in my life. My time in China was mostly spent in the east central city of Wuxi (pronounced Wu Shee). Wuxi, despite being largely unknown in the west, is a large city by any standards with approximately 6.4 million people. We embarked from Orlando and arrived in Shanghai, via San Francisco. Pu dong airport in Shanghai, despite being quite old, is very modern and very large. My first observation there was the extreme efficiency with which passengers on my flight were whisked through immigration and customs. the authorities there do an excellent job of staffing up/down depending on traffic volume. 

 

After clearing immigration/customs,  I am very impressed with the overall layout of the airport itself. I am also relived that all signs are in both Mandarin (the country's official language; there are many languages and dialects in China) and English. After retrieving our checked baggage, we were met by my son, together with old friends who made the trip from Jamaica. The drive from Shanghai to Wuxi was approximately 2.25 hours, most of which were on a six lane highway. The road conditions were quite good; however, as it was past dusk I did not form an impression on the surrounding countryside. 

 

We stayed at a Ramada in Wuxi. In the states, the Ramada brand name is in the same range as the Best Westerns of the world (mid to lower end, sometime decent, sometimes not, hotels). Apparently in the far east, the chain has a more upscale status, more akin to a Hilton or Marriott property. The check in process went smoothly; however, I found the mattresses to be much harder than they are here in America. The following day we go out and about and I find a bustling city with Dade County traffic volume. Two striking observations relate to: 1. The number of motor bikes and bicycles on the road (much more than in any urban US city I have ever been to); 2. The overall lack of respect for following the traffic laws. Thus, even when on the sidewalk, I quickly determined that you have to be very careful as bikes and motorbikes routinely use them to circumvent traffic jams and occasionally cars choose to drive on them in the quest to find scarce parking. 

 

Wuxi, unlike Shanghai, does not have much western presence. Therefore, I quickly learned what it must feel like to be a functionally illiterate adult. You see signs and from looking you have an idea what they mean; however, you really don't know for sure,as you do not read the language. To compound the problem, I was also dumb as I had little facility with the spoken language. Fortunately, my son has learnt a lot in the time he has lived there and found the time to make several trip with us. 

 

The food: The Chinese seem to eat anything that walks or grows. The food there is not for the squeamish. It bears little resemblance to either the Chinese food I have eaten in the USA or Jamaica. In fact, in a strange sense, some of it resembles more mainstay Jamaican food: chicken feet, fish soup, dasheens, cocoas, sugar cane, etc. Although rice is a staple, when you are a guest, the host does not serve it unless it is specifically requested. The reason has to do with the fact it is cheap; so it is considered an insult to serve it to your guests. In terms of taste, the food is well seasoned. So you need to like hot, salt and sweet or you are in trouble. At the dinner table, you are not served an individual meal. Rather, several dishes with meats/fish, vegetables, fruits, ground provisions (potatoes, yams, etc.), pastries, soups, nuts, etc. are served and each person takes what they want (usually via the use of chopsticks). Not only does this tend to make one overeat, but it also creates a bit of a hygiene issue as for seconds, used chopsticks are inserted into the dishes. Overall, eating with my Chinese hosts was a very interesting adventure. 

 

The culture: China seems to be a rough place. It is not for the faint of heart. Provisions for the very young, old and the disabled largely don't exist. Thus, it was not unusual to see children riding in the front of bikes with their parent navigating rush hour traffic. And for the old and disabled, they need help from family members, friends or good Samaritans or they cannot cross the streets or get up multiple flights of stairs. Individuals will just walk through you as if you don't exist if you are walking too slowly or are talking in public space. Another strange thing I noted was the proliferation of ads for "adult services", despite their illegality with some of these ads placed within 100 feet of a police station. Which leads me to another comment. While the communist party dominates the country, it largely seems to leave individuals alone in their personal lives. at least to the extent they are not deemed subversive. Thus, in some respects on an individual level, the common person there enjoys a degree of individual freedom that in the west would be subservient to the concerns of others. Smoking is largely tolerated in most social settings and even where banned, many individuals seem to ignore the law. Along the issue of law abidance, at the Airport waiting to return to the USA, we were approached by a number of (shall we call them vendors), trying to sell us everything from various high end electronics to perfume to accessories. One particularly persistent "vendor" handed me a note in perfect English indicating he had: stolen the items from immigration. Too funny! This has never happened to me in any airport anywhere I have traveled before.

 

Shopping: Everyone in China seems to be a hustler. In all but the most high end retail outlets, everything is negotiable. You would be stupid to pay the asking price unless very pressed for time. There were several instances where my wife, who has much better bargaining skills than me, got stuff at less than 50% of face. At one shopping venue, which consisted of retail space for hundreds of small vendors, we were approached by three young children (two girls and a boy), all under 14 whose parents lease retail space there. These youngsters were very friendly, spoke decent English and were not afraid to accompany strangers. This is so unlike the experience here where all young children are told to be wary of strangers. They were a good resource helping us find what we wanted at some of the cheapest prices in the area.

 

The wedding ceremony: First let me say they were legally married in November some six weeks before the actual wedding. A traditional Chinese wedding bears no resemblance to its western counterpart. For one, the attire is totally different as both the bride and groom wore mostly red. It works as follows. The groom must leave his parents house (or his place of abode), march to his bride to be parents' house with servants (to carry the bride in a carriage), musicians and entertainers in tow, as well as other participants in the wedding (groomsmen, etc.); at the parents's house, he must knock on the door, answer a series of questions satisfactorily, and then and only then, like his bride out to the carriage; she wears a veil all this time so her face is not exposed. They then march back to the parents house where she serves them tea. From there there is a procession to the wedding feast which is presided over by an MC. There are various contest, singing and a lot of food and drink. The whole process lasted about six hours from around 10 am till 4 pm. 

 

Overall Reflections on China: In many respects China was a combination of a large USA City and my early life in Jamaica. Its infrastructure (roads, bridges, airports, public transportation), is remarkably good. On the other hand, life is hard for many Chinese and they are a tough people. They eat their fish whole with bones and head intact much as is done in many third world countries. Ride in the back of trucks and on the back of bikes without any kind of protection and just do a lot of things for themselves that those in industrial countries no longer do. On both an individual and collective level, I would not take them lightly. Whether they are the country of the 21st century or not remains to be seen. But I certainly respect them as worthy opponents. There is currently a push to become a world soccer power within the next decade and I think they have a chance as they have a systematic plan to do so. Pollution and overall air quality is a big problem in the country, but the government acknowledges this and there are moves being made to address it. I don't know if they are sufficient and in time, but they do acknowledge it. 

 

I found the experience poignant. If things work out for my son and his bride, they will probably make their life there. It is a long way from Orlando, Florida, and I will miss him. However, each of us has one life to live (as far as we know), and must live it as we see fit. That is the essence of what it is to be truly free. 

[Joshua Wilson]

Welcome Back Darter! Glad to see you back home and joining us once again! Feel free to see what has been going on with football as well!

[DarterBlue2]

Welcome Back Darter! Glad to see you back home and joining us once again! Feel free to see what has been going on with football as well!

It is good to be back. Although I have been back four days now, some of the effects of jet lag are still with me. If you ever get the chance, China is certainly worth a visit. I really enjoyed the trip.

[SportsNut25]

Great write up of your trip! 

 

I found the food part most interesting (not just because I like food), because of both the rice and seasoning parts. Very interesting tidbits on both. 

[DarterBlue2]

Great write up of your trip! 

 

I found the food part most interesting (not just because I like food), because of both the rice and seasoning parts. Very interesting tidbits on both. 

Thanks. China is a very interesting place. I would highly recommend a visit to anyone with the time and resources to make the trip. If the union produces children, that will probably be my next visit.

[BrowardHandicapper]

Welcome Back DarterBlue2 and congratulations on the wedding.  Enjoyed reading the details about your trip to China.  Just out of curiosity would you be able to Skype or video chat with your son?  I was also wondering are there strict internet laws there , and did you have any kind of sense or feeling that you were in a Communist Country?   Based on the amount of Vendors and free trade it seems a little Capitalistic....